


How It Feels

by Blink23



Category: Football RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-12
Updated: 2015-01-12
Packaged: 2018-03-07 07:37:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3166772
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blink23/pseuds/Blink23
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Christoph's always figured he'd find him when he finds him, that it would be easy since they were soulmates. Now that he has his Manuel he doesn't know what the hell he was thinking.</p>
            </blockquote>





	How It Feels

Christoph's had the name on his wrist since he was born, this scar of careful, compact print blaring out 'Manuel' for the world to see. Unlike everyone else, though, he never thought anything of it. 

He knew, by default, he would be older; he wouldn't have been born with it if he wasn't, since the name needs to come from someone living. The problem was he didn't know many Manuels that were older than him. The few he did come across were far too old (okay, he's aware you're not supposed to rule out anyone, but he doesn't think he could ever fall in love with someone old enough to be his _father_ ) and every time he met one within his age range, it was always all wrong. He remembers his mother explaining to him as a child about his father, how she felt when she met him versus the other men with his name. No Manuel had ever given him that.

Once he was of age and still hadn't found him, he refused to seek out his Manuel like some people he knew did. It might have seemed stupid, but there was something that seemed so unromantic about not meeting his Manuel in an organic way. It couldn't be that hard, anyway; people had been doing it long before the matching sites they had online existed.

He would find him in the end, and that's all that mattered.

 

When the core national team players show up to practice for the first time he doesn't really think anything of it. He's got a good shot of making it, he thinks, and even if he didn't it's not like he could find them threatening to or anything. They're the best of the best, and that's what matters for Germany.

Christoph's sitting on the bench, his head down as he ties his shoes. Around him the older players were greeting their friends, introducing the younger ones to the older ones. Benni mentions his name but he doesn't look up, not even when hears Müller cackle.

“Ooh, a Christoph!”

“Shut up, Idiot,” Neuer says, sounding more annoyed than Christoph would expect, “It's none of your business.”

“If you're not going ask the baby about it, I'm going to have to do it, duh.”

“And make the kid scarred for life, probably,” Benni snorts.

“Can't let you wallow in your loneliness when you could be marrying some barely legal pretty boy.” 

“He's only two years younger than us, you moron,” Mats says, his eye roll almost audible.

He's about to comment about being able to hear them, his mouth open to reply, when he looks up and locks eyes with Neuer.

That's all it takes.

It feels like the world's shifted, like something's clicked in his brain. Neuer stumbles back into Thomas, nearly falling over completely, and he wants to run to catch him, make sure his Manuel is okay. 

_His_ Manuel, fuck.

Thomas is looking between the two of them, for once in his life unsure of what to say. No one knows what to say really, and Chris would feel awkward about all of them gawking at him if he could take his eyes off Manuel.

“What the hell is going on?”

Manuel stumbles to sit next to Chris, ignoring Lahm's question. He pulls at the gloves on his wrist, his fingers clumsy with the velcro and the tape he wears under to prevent the skin from rubbing raw, then shoves his wrist in his face.

Chris nearly giggles in relief when he sees his own sloppy handwriting staring back at him.

“Manuel-”

“Let me see,” He says quietly, “Please?”

Chris nods, tugging his own tape off, not having his wristband he usually wears on yet. It reads Manuel as it always has, but looks different somehow. More pronounced against the paleness of his skin.

“Jesus Christ, I wasn't serious! I was kidding!”

No one pays attention to Thomas.

 

Christoph spends the entire practice distracted by Manuel. He's genuinely curious about how he never realized Neuer was his Manuel, after everything. They had played against each other a few seasons ago, and even though he had spent the entire game on the pitch, he never got this feeling, this desperate itch in his fingers to touch and never let go.

During their water break he asks Shkodran if this is normal and he just laughs, glancing at his own covered wrist where Chris knows a name sits in tiny, neat letters. 

“How would I know?” He smiles, “Do you see me married off to whoever Melissa is?”

“I'm just... I don't know.”

“Yeah, but you'll figure it out,” he shrugs, knocking Chris with his shoulder as they walk back towards the pitch, “You've got the next month and a half. It's... he's your soulmate, right? So you guys are made for each other. And hey, at least you don't have to live with your mother constantly questioning when you're going to start looking anymore.”

He stops dead in his tracks.

“Fuck, I have to call my mom!”

Later, after practice is done and they're going back to change and shower before having their team meeting back at the hotel, the awkwardness seeps in. He doesn't look at Manuel at all, doesn't look at anyone really, not wanting to draw attention to himself. He doesn't know how this changes things in the team, really; he just got into the damn team, and there's a chance he won't even be picked for the World Cup squad, but if he is he doesn't want people to think it was because of Manuel. With Mario and Marco and Benni and Mats it was a natural thing, they grew up together and made their team on their own merits, not because their other half was influential and the best goalkeeper in Germany and probably the world. He doesn't want this to become an issue, this weird thing where he's Manuel's pet so he just gets thrown in the mix above someone who deserves it more.

When he's climbing back onto the bus, he's almost immediately pulled down next to Manuel. 

“I told Jogi about what's happening and we don't have to report for anything after we get back to the hotel. He said we could take however much time to be alone we want.”

Christoph can feel his face burning, making Manuel laugh, “Not like that, mind you. But we do need to sort this out.”

“You're right. I wasn't... expecting this, when I left.”

“Yeah, I didn't wake up this morning planning on meeting my soulmate either, but it'll be okay.”

“You think so?”

Manuel smiles at him, “I know so.”

They're silent for the rest of the trip, Christoph with his music and Manuel playing with his phone. He follows him silently up to his room when they finally arrive, not bothering to pay attention to the others or warning anyone where he's going. 

When they enter Manuel's room Christoph's bags are at the foot of the bed, not in his room as it should've been. 

“They're... we're sharing a room?”

Manuel shrugs, pulling Christoph's suitcase over so it rests next to his own, “Probably figured we would want to. The rest do.”

It's going to be like this, forever. It will just be a give in, that he's Manuel's, common knowledge to the world that they share beds and dates and have sex and will get married one day.

Chris suddenly feels lightheaded and drops down onto the bed. 

“Chris?”

“Huh?” He looks up, “What?”

Manuel frowns, sitting next to him on the bed, “Are you alright?”

“This... it's all so big so fast, you know? I just-”

“Hey, calm down. This is doesn't have to be a big deal.”

“But we have to fall in love and spend the rest of our lives together and have kids...”

“You want kids?”

“Well, yeah,” Chris flushes, “I wouldn't mind one... maybe two... why?”

“It's just good to know these things.”

“This is what I mean!” Christoph says, “We don't know anything about each other. We've only met once before, and we never talked or really looked at each other or anything.”

“We've got time, Chris. This doesn't happen overnight.”

“But... my parents-”

“Your parents aren't us,” He says, petting Chris' hair away from his forehead, “We don't have to do anything either of us don't want to do.”

“I want to. I do. But I don't know how to do anything,” Chris covered his face with his hands, “I don't know how you'll respond if I just want to be affectionate or something. I'm just so nervous about all this.”

“You don't have to be. And you can be as affectionate as you want, I'm not going to get mad or anything.”

“You're sure about that?”

Then, as if to prove his point, Manuel flops back on the bed, opening his arms. 

“Do your worst.”

Christoph laughs, crawling into them. He means it as a joke, just to call him out on his bluff, but then Manuel wraps his arms around him, pulling him against his chest. Christoph shivers at the feeling that comes over him, wrapping his arm around his waist and resting his head on his chest. There's something so comfortable about him, about this, despite the fact that they've never interacted before. He realizes he feels like he's meant to be here, and hides his face in Manu's neck at the thought of it, his face on fire.

“I'm glad it's you I'm with, you know.” He mumbles, not moving his face.

Manu smiles, giving him a squeeze, “Me too.”

Christoph ends up dozing off on Manuel's shoulder. His head fits perfectly in the crook of his neck, and Manuel tries not to think of it, or how warm his skin is against him. The boy radiates heat, something Manuel can appreciate as someone who's always cold. 

They fit together, just like he knew they would once he figured out that Christoph was his three years ago.

He stares into space, rubbing a hand up and down Christoph's back absentmindedly as he thinks about it. He hadn't been completely surprised that Chris was his before this morning, like he had said. When they had played Bochum in the Pokal a few years back, he had spent the entire match with this odd buzzing under his skin, distracting him so badly it arguably let to their only goal. He hadn't had any idea why, until he got home and saw the match report, noting that Christoph Kramer had gotten a yellow card. The name was something that always would stick out to Manuel, no matter how he tried to ignore it, but he isn't expecting what he gets when he looks him up on the internet.

When you get your name later on in life, it tends to be a big deal, more than worthy of remembering the date. His was 19th of February, about five weeks before his fifth birthday. The same day Kramer was born. 

Christoph Kramer was his.

He was also young. Twenty might not seem that young to most people when it comes to finding their other half, but Manuel was not most people. He knew what it was like to be barely out of your teens and have a career like theirs, and knew if someone would've come along out of the blue and told him he was their soulmate he would have probably freaked out over what this could mean. In some cases, players who found themselves the soulmates of other players were sold to their partners club against their will or worse, had their contracts canceled if they weren't viewed as important enough to the club, their duties to their other half being viewed as more important. He had no doubt Christoph had the potential to be great but he was still not a top priority, and there was no telling how it would effect him if Manuel told him and he had to tell Leverkusen. Eventually they would meet, but when it was right, not when he would have a panic attack and resent Manuel for potentially screwing over his dream. 

So he waited, gave him time to just be in his early twenties. He paid attention to Christoph's career, but otherwise tried not to think of it. They never met in another match, and Christoph stayed with the youth international sides, so they never interacted. Until, of course, this morning. Much like Manuel had thought, fate would work in their favor.

He sighs, kissing Christoph's hair. He wonders if he should wake Chris up so they could go grab dinner soon. Despite what Jogi had said about them not having to report to any of their meetings, he knows that missing dinner is probably not a good thing. He's not sure if Jogi would be okay with them ignoring their carefully planed out meals for something from room service, but he's doesn't think he'd begrudge him for trying to keep Christoph away from the sexual innuendos that were sure to be hurled at them either.

He decides to let Chris decide. He gently shakes Christoph, making his whine and press himself closer to Manuel before he becomes awake, pulling away to blink sleepily at him. 

“Hi.”

“Hi. We should order dinner in soon, or go down to eat.”

“Okay.”

Christoph bites his lip, staring at Manuel's mouth before he seems to just say the hell with it and kiss him.

“I... is that okay?” He asks, nervously, once he pulls away, “I wanted to but I don't... “

“It's more than fine, believe me.”

To prove his point, Manuel kisses him again. And again. Soon enough, Christoph's shirt is gone, Manuel looming over him as he kisses him like he can't get enough. And the thing is, he really can't. It feels so right, so much better than any of the meaningless dates and hook ups he's had before. Christoph's meant to be here, meant to be his.

Manuel's palming him through his track pants when he pushes away from his lips, panting hard and his mouth swollen.

“I... I have to tell you...” He moans as Manu gives him a squeeze, “I...”

“what is it?”

“I've never been with...” Christoph trails off, flushing bright red, and Manuel groans. 

“Never? Not even with a girl?”

Christoph shakes his head, biting his lip as he shove his hips up into Manuel's hand.

He's a virgin. Of course he is; he seems like the type to be and it's not that rare of a decision to make. Some people decide that they're not into the whole random hook ups without it meaning anything with the solid knowledge that there is someone they're destine to be with out there. Manuel gets it, really, even though he never was into it. The fact that Christoph's been saving himself, been waiting for his soulmate, for him, makes him twitch in his pants. 

“Fuck...”

Christoph chuckles weakly, his hands gripping at Manuel's shoulders. He's never felt this desperate from just kissing and a little groping. He's never felt this desperate from anything. It's mostly what drives him when he lifts his hips to let Manuel remove the last of his clothing.

He's so beautiful, all pale and lean limbs, his blue eyes wide and clear. He wants to just stare at him, but the possessive half of him wants nothing more than to be inside him, to have him every and any way he can, because Christoph is his and nothing can change that.

Christoph's heart feels like it's going to beat out of his chest as he lies there, Manuel completely silent as his eyes going over his body hungrily. He reaches for Manuel's wrist, biting his lip out of nervous habit.

“Manu...?”

Manuel seems to snap out of his daze, licking his lips before smiling at Chris.

“Sorry... You're so gorgeous...” 

Christoph flushes prettily at the compliment, letting out a nervous giggle, “It's more than okay, but I'm feeling a little underdressed compared to you.” 

He snaps the waist of his track pants and Manuel laughs, standing up from the bed to pull then off. Christoph's trembling when he pulls him close again, hiding his face in his neck.

“Hey,” Manuel says quietly, “we don't have to, alright? You just figured this out, and if you're a virgin... it's probably not a good idea.”

“I want to, but...”

Manuel kisses his jaw, “there are ways, you know,” he murmurs against his neck, working his way down his torso, “I don't necessarily need to be inside you.”

Then Manuel shifts down and takes him into his mouth and Christoph's vision whites out. Manuel works on him with his mouth and hands, his eyes never leaving Christoph's face, the boy almost screaming when Manuel starts to deep throat him. He never really thought about it before, but Manuel's suddenly very, very happy that his blowjob skills are something to brag about.

Christoph is very, very happy for the same reason. He's trying to keep still and not thrust up but he can't, wiggling his hips until Manuel brackets his waist with his hands and pins him down. 

“Fuck Manu, you're so perfect...”

Manuel chuckles, making Christoph groan, before he pulls off, “I don't know if that counts when I have your dick in my mouth.”

Christoph just groans and pushes his head back towards his dick.

He smirks and then takes him back into his mouth, stroking his thighs with his fingers tips.

“Manuel... I...”

Chris is trying to pull Manuel away and push in deeper at the same time, on the verge of coming. Manuel pulls away just to look at him, completely debauched and trying desperately to hold off his orgasm to prolong the pleasure. 

“Come on,” he murmurs, kissing the inside of his thigh as he strokes him, “Come on, Chris.”

Then he swallows him down his throat and Christoph comes, one hand fisting the sheets and the other on the back of Manuel's neck. 

Manuel pulls away from Christoph once he done and straddles his thighs, his hand working on himself as he looks down at him. He looks so blissed out and boneless lying there, licking his lips, his skin flushed. He reaches forward and wraps his fingers around Manu's, the both of them working him together.

Manuel comes all over Christoph's stomach with a few strokes and Christoph thumbing the head, looking up at him through his lashes. He leans down to kiss Christoph once he's done, flopping over to his side when his legs couldn't hold him anymore. He rolls of the bed to get something to clean him off, rubbing his stomach down with a towel before throwing it off to the side.

Christoph immediately crowds in when he lies back down, kissing him repeatedly on the mouth and giggling. 

“Well good thing you've gotten over your affection issues,” Manuel mumbles between kisses, “and here I was worried you'd be uncomfortable with me for awhile.”

Christoph pulls away, suddenly feeling awkward, not knowing if he's being told to back off or not.

“I'm not-”

“Nonono, get back here,” Manuel manhandles him so he back to lying across his chest, “I meant it when I said it was fine. I'm just surprised that you're not shying away from me now.”

“It's kind of dumb to feel that way, considering I'm naked and you just blew me.”

Manuel chuckles but otherwise stays quiet, his fingers running through Chris's sweaty hair. He lets him, his head on his shoulder and eyes closed. He looks so sweet like this, he lets his fingers trailing down his cheek and across his lips, making Chris open his eyes.

“You know, Thomas will be able to tell the minute he sees us that we've fooled around.”

Christoph makes a face. “Room service?”

Manuel nods, and then smirks, “at least you won't have to get dressed. Do you want to order now or do you want to wait?” 

“Later,” Christoph yawns, resting his head down, “Nap first.”

Manuel makes a little noise of agreement, and they both slip under the covers, Manuel turning on the tv and lowering the volume so Chris can sleep if he wants. Christoph can't get over how cozy it is to be cuddled up with him, even though he feels like it shouldn't be. They barely know each other but they still click unbelievably well.

'If they make me give up my team,' he thinks, his eyes closed and his cheek pressed to Manuel's chest, 'This might be worth it.'


End file.
